Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning

A widower at forty-two. What Kateri gave me… what cancer took away… and how I'm coping with life from the woods of Vermont
Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning
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  • Widower Day 337… Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning… 29.

    Posted at 7:40 pm by Darren Lidstrom, on March 25, 2019

    img_4586It’s the second day of my weekend and after staying up way too late last night… but enjoying no alarm!… I decided to try and pluck some things off of the “To Do” list today.  You know, those little things that you just keep meaning to get to… or are blatantly disregarding?! So I did chicken chores, replaced the Daytime Running Light on the ol’ buggy, brought wood over from the potting shed… with help from said buggy… and a sled, changed out the drip pans on the stove because the old ones had literally disintegrated, and then… well… I rearranged the living room.

    Now changing up the living room was no where near my list of things to do today, but I am actually almost giddy thinking about sitting back on the couch in comfy clothes… chicken pot pie on the lap… and getting lost in a movie in my new surroundings!… a whole new experience! It feels good to have done something today, spur of the moment, that will also provide something new… a little variety… in my day to day.  It is kind of a strange feeling sitting here in a space in which Kateri has not seen set up this way before. It’s a moment where the Old Life and New Life overlap in my head… but I feel good about it. I also feel good about the fact that I still have two Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups for my movie!

    Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning

    Day 29… woke up at 7:30am to my alarm, snoozed until 8:15ish.

    Made coffee and crawled back into bed to write notes for yesterday. I would really like to get to the point where I am going to bed earlier and spending time in bed writing.
    Went to Randy and Vicky’s to drop off my drills. They were gonna mend their garden boxes.

    a. We hung out behind their garage and smoked a joint away from O#$%^… who was in the house.
    b. They had been having a rough go at it the last couple of days. Stress of everything (Kateri) kinda bearing down on them. Randy wanted to drink a bottle of whisky the other night. Thankfully he chose not to. Although, with how well he has changed his life around, I don’t think tying one on is the worst thing in the world.
    c. Randy mentioned that he had been getting angry lately.

    a. I don’t have any room right now for the anger. Once you get into anger… it can lead you down some deep, dark paths.
    b. They asked that I check out a screen door for them at LaValley’s…. I never got one… or went back to their house.

    Went to LaValley’s and Home Depot

    a. They didn’t have the wainscoting I was looking for so I just went to Home Depot to see if they had anything.
    b. They had sheets of bead board which is what I was looking for. I had to have them cut them in half hoping they would fit inside the Jeep… they didn’t. I had to strap them to the top… and then pull over at the Powerhouse Mall to redo it so that they wouldn’t fly off and go through someone’s windshield.

    I was able to get them up on the wall. I don’t know how well they are attached… a lot of nails just went into drywall. I didn’t glue them or anything in case I needed to remove them.

     

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    • ← Widower Day 336… Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning… Starting with 30.
    • Widower Day 338… Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning… 28. →
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    Author: Darren Lidstrom

    Posted in cancer, grief, inspirational, loss, Uncategorized, widower | 0 Comments | Tagged cancer, grief, grieving, loss, marriage, mourning, thefirstthirty, widower, widower thoughts, widows |

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