Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning

A widower at forty-two. What Kateri gave me… what cancer took away… and how I'm coping with life from the woods of Vermont
Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning
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  • Widower Day 348… 18.

    Posted at 3:30 am by Darren Lidstrom, on April 6, 2019

    img_4732Sometimes, the ol’ balance scale is off kilter and I have to focus on whatever carries more weight. Sometimes the balance scale… feels like it has 7 arms.

    Some other times, I just want the night to last another twelve hours so that I don’t have to get out of my cozy bed… and start a new day. But then… then… it begins anyways.

    Thirty Days of Mo(u)rning

    Day 18… woke up at 6:12 on the couch… went up to bed until 8:00am

    Had a lazy morning… didn’t do much.

    At 11:00ish I got a newspaper (still haven’t read it) and went to the farm.

    a. Got a Mocha and a blueberry muffin. Talked with someone who I couldn’t remember their name.
    b. Talked with Anna on the picnic table about what’s going on. Maya came over on her way to lunch. She was stylin’ with a “Wolf” hat (almost airbrushie), grey long sleeve, swim trunks (palm leaves type)… Anna said she wants to do a photo shoot with her on “Farm Style”.
    c. Saw Michelle. We caught up. She gave me a Rose of Sharon (Kateri wanted her to order them) and some kale for chickens. We cried next to the Jeep.
    d. Went to the house to see Adie. She has to leave in a week to help with her father. Much earlier than expected which is hard for her.
    e. Chatted with Dave and Luke for a bit about drinking and shit.
    f. Saw Double E. We’ll get together and eat or play disc golf

    Went and got Death Certificates. Rich came running down the hill with them. He is a very nice guy.

    a. They looked fancy.
    b. It’s kinda strange having them.

    Saw Eric at the light in Norwich.

    Decided to go to Best Buy and get a camera for the computer.

    a. Passed Eric in W. Leb

    Came home and raked the rock walls and area next to the road. It was quick and easy

    Played a little guitar. Played a little Mappy/Pole Position/Galaga/Ms. Pac-man.

    Dinner: Hippie cup of noodles, iceburg salad, orange, Cheetos.

    Talked on the phone with Nate D.  Jared/Double E/Nate were all texting me at the same time… spoke with Nate.

    Fell asleep in the chair from midnight till 2:00am.

    Widower Notes n Thoughts:

    • The perfect gift for a widow/widower?… a back scratcher! It’ll change their life… and save their door frames.
    • It’s nice to look up and see the Rose of Sharon from the notes… in my living room. Six months ago I thought I had killed it!

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    • ← Widower Day 347… 19… A Good “meh” Day.
    • Widower Day 349… on 350… cuz I fell asleep writing about 17. →
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    Author: Darren Lidstrom

    Posted in grief, inspirational, loss, Uncategorized, Widow, widower | 0 Comments | Tagged grief, grieving, loss, marriage, mourning, thefirstthirty, thirtydaysofmorning, threfirstthirtydays, widower, widower thoughts, widows |

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